


ever see somebody ruin their own life

by tardisandjam



Series: if you had to choose [3]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-06-01 04:23:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6500683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tardisandjam/pseuds/tardisandjam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part of him wonders if he ever would’ve encountered Malick in that other universe, but he thinks he would’ve known better. </p><p>Then again, it doesn’t matter. He turned the genie down on both accounts, thinking he could handle SHIELD and HYDRA on his own, that he could forget what it was like to be loved instead of hated.</p><p>He was wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	ever see somebody ruin their own life

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, I've been fighting this one the least of the three endings for the fic. I am working on the other two, though, so if this ending doesn't satisfy you, hang tight! Hopefully one of the others does. 
> 
> Spotify played Satisfied and The Reynolds Pamphlet back to back and then this mess happened, so.
> 
> Title from The Reynolds Pamphlet from Hamilton.

If he has to listen to Malick drone on and on anymore, he’s honestly going to bash his face in with the lamp hidden in his side pack. Grant gets it, he does- they’re going to get HYDRA’s all powerful Inhuman leader back from the other side of the god forsaken universe. It’s of the utmost importance. What he doesn’t like (at all, he hates it-- he’s good at taking orders but not from people like the other head) is why Malick has suddenly become the one in charge, just because he’s older. The old coot hasn’t seen actually action in god knows how long, he has no idea what it’s really like out there. And yet Malick’s the one making the decisions, yanking Grant around like a fool. 

(After this is all over, maybe he’ll ask nicely to smash the old man’s face in. Will he be allowed to? Probably not. But he can still fantasize about it. Part of him wonders if he ever would’ve encountered Malick in that other universe, but he thinks he would’ve known better. 

Then again, it doesn’t matter. He turned the genie down on both accounts, thinking he could handle SHIELD and HYDRA on his own, that he could forget what it was like to be loved instead of hated.

He was wrong.)

He’s rolling his shoulders a little, ignoring the death glare digging holes in his back. By the time he’d gotten the whole genie situation under control, he’d gotten the reports about _Jemma_ \- Simmons. She’s Simmons to him here, not Jemma. She is not his wife, she is not the mother of his child. (Taylor, Taylor, _**Taylor**_ , his little girl, the little girl who looked up at him like he was a _hero_ , his daughter. He misses her with all his heart. He misses his family more than anything. Jemma, Leo, Taylor, Buddy, Lincoln. They were his and he was theirs.)

But he can’t help but see Simmons as his Jemma- she is, by all accounts, the same woman. It’s the experiences where they deviate. His Jemma is sweet and gentle. The woman in front of him is feral, hardened by the hell she experienced. It’s almost why he’s more grateful to take Leo across the universe- he doesn’t think he’d be able to see the terror in her eyes intensify beyond its current point. 

It’s a mistake, but he looks back at her for a moment before going through the portal. She’s glaring, eyes full of hatred and disgust aimed at him. It sends a pang of loss through his chest again, and he turns away. She is not his to love.

* * *

 

Deep down, Grant had believed that he would be able to handle coming back to his universe. That he could handle losing his family, having their love replaced with disgust. 

He’s wrong.

Leo is spitting venom every chance he gets, hitting where it hurts. When he brings up the fact that they had been a family, that Grant had ruined it, the man in question loses it a little bit, and Leo takes a tumble down one of the sand dunes head first. It’s too close to what he’s lost. 

(He already knows that Simmons hates him with every fiber of her being, that Leo hates him. Lincoln barely knows him here and Taylor- Taylor doesn’t exist. His family doesn’t exist.)

Grant’s sure that Leo would keep pushing his buttons, and it probably would’ve happened had they not run into a man in an astronaut suit. This has to be Will Daniels. He’d heard about the man, at least in regards to his Jemma. (And he has to remind himself that she isn’t his, that she never has been, and never will be his, here in this universe.

Still, he feels a sickeningly twisted amount of joy when they find out he’s dead. The corpse is being inhabited by the very Inhuman they’re here to escort home. Of course, that goes up in flames- quite literally.

But Jemma, he knows, will be devastated. He cannot revel in what he knows will destroy her.)

* * *

 

_Fucking_ Coulson. In any universe, he’s a nuisance. In the other universe, he was the equivalent of a very persistent rash- scratching and engaging got rid of him for a while, but eventually he’d come back. Here, he’s an outright enemy. 

And right now, he’s a killer. 

Grant’s chest is crushed, he’s choking on his own blood... he’s dying. 

Isn’t that something. He’s actually _dying_. His entire life has been close call after close call, and though Grant has never counted on living a long life- first as a SHIELD specialist, then as a rogue, and lastly as HYDRA’s head -he never expected to die this way. (Nobody expects to die this way.

It’s almost poetic, he thinks. This is how Kara died, drowning as her lungs filled with blood. It’s only right that he suffers the same, if not worse.)

Grant closes his eyes with some effort, and he can- he can see them. His family. Lincoln is helping out at the grill and Leo is chasing Buddy around, and Jemma- oh, god, his Jemma is leaning against him and she’s smiling and Taylor is in his arms, little face pressed into his neck, _“Daddy, I love you--”_  

His hand fumbles weakly at the pack at his side- his fingertips graze the cool metal of the lamp briefly and he’s hoping and praying that it counts as rubbing the lamp because he just wants to see them again, just one last time, his family, Lincoln and Leo and Buddy and Taylor and JemmaJemma _Jemma--_

It evidently doesn’t matter, because life leaves him a few seconds later.

* * *

 

“They found this in his pack?” Malick eyes the golden lamp cautiously, longing to touch it but resisting. It is not his magic to toy with, not his place. “We could’ve used this to get to the other planet all along, instead of requiring the SHIELD scientists. Shame.” 

The HYDRA agent nods in agreement, if only to avoid some sort of punishment. “Sir, _he’s_ asking for you.”

“Of course. And he’ll want to see this.” He smiles for a moment, picking up a napkin so he can transport it easily. “I do suppose we owe Ward a bit of thanks for hanging onto this. Another service he’s providing after death.” 

**Author's Note:**

> If you guys need answers/want to send me a prompt/want to send me a time stamp for a previously posted prompt/etc, you can find me [here](http://ofdissections.tumblr.com/) at my RP blog (which has also somewhat become my writing blogs, yikes @ me.)


End file.
